Better Than a Hallelujah

Last night I had a dream realized.  Something I never anticipated.  Something I had always desired.  Something I figured would always be this little longing in my heart.  

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Music has always played an integral part in my life.  Music moves me in deep and profound ways.  Always has.  I love that God wired me this way.  I can pinpoint key events in my life with hearing certain music.  Like Erasure takes me immediately back to high school dances.  I can be right back in 11th grade on stage when I hear Don't Cry for me Argentina.  I am thrown to Sunday church services when I was a child when I hear the Doxology.  

I find that not only does music affect my heart, but often my entire being.  

I first heard of Amy Grant from my sweet friend, Christina.  The first song I ever heard was a song called Angels.  I was hooked.  Her voice was balm to a heart that was searching and also hurting.  From that point on I soaked in her poetry.  Every song I heard I played over and over.  The sweetness of the words pouring wisdom and truth into a heart that was beginning to soften.

Each stage in my life, truly, I have a song from Amy that is the background music for that portion of my life.  Angels for sure is one.  Lead Me On was from a tough point in my late teen years…. Takes a Little Time from the time we struggled with conceiving…. I know I have a weird mind.  But the depth that music and stories that the songs spin have woven their ways into my heart- into my life- into my soul.

Last night, we got to go to a very special concert.  For my 40th birthday.  

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And we got to sit in the front row.

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It was an intimate evening- only about 100 people.  Low key.  She wove stories into each song.  She sang songs that both Michael and I have such strong attachment to.

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She truly was wonderful.  

But.

The most amazing thing.

This was a special time.  Before the  concert began, we went to a special cocktail hour.

And I had the opportunity, to meet Amy.

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She is beautiful- truly, inside and out.

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She took time with each person.  Listening, talking, completely engrossed with each person.

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Even me.  ME. 

She was so engaged.  She listened to my dorky try at sounding relaxed and cool.  And my tears.  And she let me gush a little.  And she held my hand and was gracious, and loving…and real and compassionate.  And she made me feel as though she and I had been friends for years.  
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 We talked kids, texting, our upcoming trip to China.

I was able to thank her.  For what her music has meant to me. 

And how it played an instrumental part in my relationship with God.

And how very thankful I am that He has used her in my life.  Even if she had no clue.

Until last night.

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For this I am amazed.

This opportunity is something I dreamed of.  Something I never expected.  Isn't it sweet?  I am in awe that something so trivial really, something so selfish in so many ways- that God blessed me with this opportunity?  And knowing that He heard the secret whispers of my heart….makes it all the more sweet and emotional for me.  

Always know that God hears even the little whispers of desire.  He hears the smallest voice.  He hears your deepest fears, your deepest desires.  

And He surprises you.

And catches you off guard.

And loves you passionately. 

And gives you precious gifts.

Thank you.

 

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6 thoughts on “Better Than a Hallelujah

  1. Isn’t her new song amazing?! Had to pull over on the road b/c I couldn’t see through my tears! What a great bday present for you! Couldn’t think of anyone who deserves it more! Only a few weeks left momma! Praying it goes quickly! Love ya!

  2. Makin me a little teary here, but then I just “giggle” I could “giggle if you want to”.
    2 Concerts, don’t worry I am not taking it personally that your brain is lacking 😉 Better start remembering or I will bust out some “El Shaddai” on ya.

  3. Erasure! OMG… Chains of Love!! I had the tape. Played it over and over in my Fiero. Too funny. I thot I was the only one that remembered them. So, was Vince there? Love love love Vince Gill. What a great nite with Amy.

  4. I love that new Amy Grant song, too. It makes me cry. Oh, that the Lord wants to hear everything we can possibly tell him, simply because he’s that kind of personal God. He truly loves us- every detail. Sounds like last night you got to feel that way and thank someone who’s been a very real and wonderful part of His love for you. I am soooo happy for you!

  5. Eegaads! I’m so glad you got to do that, but so thinking I shoulda been there with you. And CeeJay, El Shaddai? Dude! How about some “Sing Yo Praise to the Lord.” Rock on sistah, rock on! XO

  6. Courtney, I think a much better birthday gift for Jenny would be the two of us to go with Jenny to the concert 😉 I do enjoy “Sing Your Praise to the Lord” but have a bigger drippy high school memory to “El Shaddai”.

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