Hurry up and wait


I am such an impatient person.  

I confess that right here.  Right now.  

My heart is aching for my little one.  As I watched my kids at the dinner table last night, eating chicken, and salad and rice, joking with us….and I glanced over and saw that empty chair and my heart ached.  I wondered, what is she doing right now?  Sleeping?  Just waking up?  With that sweet sleepy smell and the bed head?  Does she have someone to cuddle her?  

I want to hear the sound of her little feet running down the hallway to our room in the morning.  Asking if she can get up- or climbing into bed for a snuggle.  I want to hear Katie and her sweet sister playing together.  

I am longing to see Jack read to her.  And Sammy make her laugh with abandon.  I want to watch Michael lift her high over his head while she squeals.  I want to listen to them praying together.  I want to give that sweet girl bubble baths, and hug away the bad dreams in the middle of the night. 

I am one of many momma's out there waiting for their little ones.  Be it in their belly, or in their heart.  I am feeling the distance right now.  My heart is praying.  My heart is aching.  

While she doesn't even realize it, her family is loving her.  And praying for her.  And longing for her to come home.

So, I wait.  Paperwork has no time.  People in government offices have no priority for whose paperwork gets processed first.  So I wait.  And Michael waits.  

Sweet one, we are here.  We love you already.  We are praying.  And we will wait forever if we have to.  


2 thoughts on “Hurry up and wait

  1. Very well worded Jenny. There are so many moments when the waiting just doesn’t make sense. While we were waiting for Baden I thought of all the things we were doing while he was going about his routine at his SWI in Shenzhen. The thought that got me through that was that he was getting a little more time in only place he’d known, before we came to take him away from that world. The waiting still stinks though. Are you putting together a 100 Good Wishes Quilt for her?

  2. HI! So glad you found my blog so I could find yours!!! Can’t wait to follow you on your journey to become six. And… I SO relate to this post! Beautifully written. Thanks so much for finding me and commenting!! You have a beautiful family! Deb

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