Lately I have been inspired to become a better homemaker. I think as I have grown older and have experienced my last "babyhood" in the house, I look at our home differently. I think with tiny babies in the home, just surviving until Michael made it home was good enough for me. With the possible move ahead, Michael and I have spoken so much about what the move would mean for him, for me, for our family. I commented to him (and he agreed) that the most difficult transition would land upon me.
Our home is my workplace. Michael is my co-worker, but only on a part time basis. He has an even more difficult job outside of the home and he provides so much so that I can stay home. I think the Lord has really been convicting my heart about the fact that I was just "getting by" in my work role. Sure I fed my kids, did the laundry (most of the time), kept the bathrooms smelling good (which with 2 boys and a little "rose" is not the easiest feat) and kept the floors free of stickydom. But was I being the wife and mom the Lord really wanted me to be. The answer was no. But I didn’t want to change. I was totally content to get by doing the smallest amount of work and then making sure that I got all the "me time" I thought I so desperately needed.
Michael always praised me in my work. He has always told me that I have the much harder job. In some ways I agree. But he also has the responsibility of providing for our family. Sometimes I have really mishandled our money so that is an extra burden on him. He NEVER complains. I am so blessed to have him as my husband. And this is why I have begun to change my ways and the Lord has changed my heart and attitude towards my job.
I have begun being a more active homemaker. I have begun to view my job as a HUGE HUGE blessing and privilege, and my heart has changed. I no longer count the minutes until Michael gets home so that I can have a "break" (well, ok, some days I do), but I look forward to a warm, sweet family dinner together and in a clean, warm kitchen. I have started keeping totally on top of our laundry, and no longer dread the mountain that awaits me in the laundry room. I have actually begun baking…making homemade bread, muffins, cake, cookies. I can tell you this has not gone unnoticed. And my family is eating healthier because of it. My floors are mopped now (and can you imagine it only takes about 15 minutes to vacuum and mop my floors?), and I no longer have clutter in every nook and cranny not seen by others. (still a lot to go)
And what have I found? Passion. A passion for my family and my home and that it be a soft place for Michael, Jack, Sam and Katie to fall. Love. A love for my family that I did not know could run so deep. Time. I have so much more time to ENJOY my time with Michael and the kids with no cloud of "what I should be doing" looming over my head. Prayer. I have found that as I do the daily tasks of running my home, I pray as I go. Not only for each member of our immediate family but for other needs as well. Calling and purpose. What a blessing to be called to be a wife and mom. I finally feel as though I am no longer looking for outside praise. I LOVE my job and feel as though I know why the Lord put me here. Peace. I so much needed peace in my soul. And I am beginning to feel that peace.
I am preparing my heart to move. While it will still be a difficult transition, I know that my job is secure. My job will actually take on a more dramatic role. I will need to fluff up the pillows of a new home and make sure the bed is soft for the landing of my family.