Wistful

Lindsay_and_taylor I was looking at some old photos of my niece who is off to Azusa Pacific for her first year of college in a couple of weeks.  I am getting weepy about the entire thing.  I love Lindsay like she is my own.  I have watched her grow up- from babysitting her, to taking her places to hanging out to really loving the beautiful, amazing, Godly young woman she is.  I find it utterly impossible that the sweet little girl I played Little Mermaid in the pool with is now going off to college.

I think the thing that shocks me the most is how quickly the time passed.  It seems like just yesterday I was holding this sweet little bundle in my arms, and now she is off to college.  Then, her brother, the amazing Taylor, is going to be a sophmore in high school.  That shocks me again.  The little guy I played Stan the Garbage Truck Man.. with and giggled when he sang Baby Baluuuugaaaaa…..and finished it with a "thank you"  like a regular lounge singer at the age of 3.  Then watching him use his amazing gifts in singing, piano playing and acting, I am in awe.  But that just makes me realize how quickly this life passes.

I look then to my own family.  My children are growing everyday and there is nothing I can do to stop it.  I cherish every time Jack still needs me to comfort him, or Sammy cries about a small fall, or Katie Mei calls out "hug, kiss, Mama".  There is just nothing sweeter.  I know the days of these small children being in our home are numbered.  Yes, we will move on to bigger kid issues and blessings and giggles, but the little sounds and tastes will be missed.

I then realized how often I take for granted the time I have been given as their mom.  The daily grind of motherhood often chips away at my sanity and my emotions.  How many more fights can I break up?  How many more poopy diapers do I have to change?  How many more time outs will I have to grit my teeth through?  And yet, when I look at my neice and nephew, I realize it.  Not enough.  Never enough.  I need to look at my children as the amazing gifts they are. 

So to my sweet Lindsay and Taylor, thank you.  Thank you for letting me be a part of your lives.  You are both amazing people who I am honored to know.  Please know that I will be constantly and consistently lifting you up in prayer.  I also want you to know that if you ever need someone to sing "Stan the garbage truck Man…" with or tell you "If I were a man with a mustache, people would say, ‘there goes that guy with a mustache"" with….I will always be here.  I love you.

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6 thoughts on “Wistful

  1. Make me cry why don’t ya… Sheesh! Such sweet beautiful words. THANK YOU! In a blink of an eye, cherish everyday.
    Love you my little sis and awesome aunt to Lindsay and Taylor You have been an amazing influence in their life.

  2. What an awesome post.
    I experience a lot of that when I see moms bring the ‘babies’ in that I have delivered. They are growing WAY too fast. Off to school so soon. Except when waiting on referral time seems to fly by and we have to stop and appreciate it. It’s the simple moments that make the best memories of our lives.

  3. I must agree with you, time has just flown by. I remember going to visit Taylor when he was born, I guess the problem is that I don’t think that we have aged at all. Right? Right? Right?

  4. I bet you are a great Aunt!! Oh and I think we should apply to be a team in the next Amazing Race. Friends that have never met, I don’t think they have had that on the show! Then again it would probably be too hard to leave that wonderful family of yours! BTW Mamma Mia was great!

  5. Mariah,
    LOLOLOL- if you were only with me on that looooong plane flight to China, you would be retracting your invitation to be a team on TAR….although it would be fun. : )

  6. in your email i love how you put “let me know if you’re mad”. how could i be mad at such a loving and wonderful blog???? you are so sweet aunt jenny and i love you lots and lots πŸ™‚ thank you for all your compliments. i love you and your family sooooo much! miss you guys and expect me to visit when i move to azusa! πŸ™‚
    ps. sorry i didn’t comment on this before, but my stupid email has been a pain in the neck and i haven’t been able to get my email for a long time…ugh…i hate technology

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