While waiting for test results….

I will share my thoughts.

I know.

Hold on to your pants.

  • my house looks like it threw up.
  • my laundry has not folded itself
  • I told it to.
  • Stupid laundry.
  • I wish I could share with you that I have lost all my stress weight.
  • But I haven’t.
  • So I can’t.
  • Pass the crackers.
  • I have a slight obsession with my daughters bald head.
  • I have a slight obsession with touching and rubbing said head.
  • “slight” is subjective.
  • all our kids will be at the same school next year
  • all our kids are SO excited.
  • me too.
  • why are june bugs crawling all over?
  • do they not consult the calendar?
  • they don’t consult me
  • I am scared.
  • of the summer.
  • and the pool.
  • and bathing suits.
  • and cellulite
  • I love being outside
  • I detest the smell of outside once inside
  • wow
  • that made very little sense
  • what else is new
  • I miss my sisters
  • my bestie and her sweet girl are coming TODAY
  • I am so freaking excited
  • SNL Surprise??
  • Anyone??
  • My lips are dry, my knuckles are locked
  • Two babies at the SAME TIME?
  • It is on HULU
  • You are welcome
  • more dead armadillos
  • thankfully not in the hay meadow
  • just on the road
  • turtles will be next
  • I hate turtles
  • they scare me
  • especially big ones
  • all dry and wrinkly
  • I love lotion
  • Katie has learned many things through her cancer trip
  • the main one
  • she NEVER wants to be a nurse or doctor
  • but she loves hers
  • things I have learned
  • always carry an emesis bag
  • look at that word
  • it is fancy
  • and never ever wear non-waterproof mascara
  • if you could wouldn’t you want clean sheet day everyday?
  • haven’t been sleeping well
  • there is no good TV on at night
  • ever listened to Coast to Coast AM?
  • wow
  • please do
  • at your earliest convenience
  • I have learned much about aliens
  • and doomsday preparation
  • and people in Arkansas.
  • I love the news here in OK.
  • I do.
  • the weather guy wears a sparkly bedazzled tie when there is bad weather
  • in LA the weather guy talks about Britney Spears.
  • I have learned to LOVE thunderstorms
  • our back yard floods
  • Michael gets out a sump pump
  • that is fun to say
  • like francisco
  • I cannot not wear make up anymore
  • I feel old
  • let’s get real
  • I look old.
  • I want to go on a vacation.
  • I would love to go to Hawaii.
  • but.
  • That means bathing suits.
  • remember the crackers?
  • and the cellulite?
  • never mind.
  • I love cake batter.
  • and cookie dough.
  • maybe I am starting to see a reason for my fears
  • of summer.
  • RING PHONE
  • this waiting for test results is killing me.
  • so now
  • I will go
  • smash june bugs
  • fold sheets
  • and pray that whatever Maisy has in her mouth right now
  • isn’t an armadillo
  • um
  • ew
  • EW
  • a turtle.
  • Goodbye
  • forever.
  • or until tomorrow.